I’m going to try and make this quick and say it while I have some strength because I am probably going to go into an autoimmune disease flare. My soul is absolutely devastated, my heart is so raw.
I was lied to.
Little did I know that my post just a lil over an hour ago would be one that I will need to try to cling to. “Trust even when it’s a hard thing to do.” My heart burns, and my eyes are already swollen. It has been confirmed by reaching out to Genny’s previous owner, she is 14 years old. She is poor because she has been worked by the Amish and unproperly fed. Her teeth fooled the onsite Vet, and two others. Her teeth are rounded and short because she was given corncobs to eat. A 14-year draft that has been worked, like she has and fed corn cobs, isn’t in the same age range as one that has lived an easier life.
My soul groans. I just don’t understand. All I can think about is that I saved her from the kill buyer only to watch and care for her in death. Is this really what God wanted!?! I can barely find my breath.
My face is completely soaked in tears at the realization that I will not have as long with her as I thought I would. I will not be riding her as I thought I would. I’m broken.
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